Tyrants are very good at keeping would-be allies at each other’s throats. Online trolling only makes this worse, and we can’t afford that right now.
Here are some tools to avoid rancor and hatred, which have become the currency of social media, and turn enemies into allies, even if only on a slim strip of political turf.
Step One:
Your post gets a hot response, something like, “You are a mouthpiece for a politically convenient narrative, you are trying to virtue signal and you have no compassion for humanity.” How can you reply? Get really pissed off…and close your computer. You can’t troll back with a closed laptop.
Step Two:
The next day, reread the post at face value, without reacting to their tone or making assumptions about their motives. What might be true? What might you agree with? In this example, it is true that I was not being compassionate about all of humanity, so the first line of my response could be, “You are right, I did not mention some terrible humanitarian crises in the world right now.” Find some way, ANY WAY, to agree with them.
Step Three:
Now find a question that you can ask them. One way to start your question is “Help me out…” as in, “Help me out, what action do you suggest I take to address these humanitarian crises?” Post your comment without adding anything else.
Step Four:
Ask yourself if your troll is right in any other ways. In this example, I’ve been known to virtue signal, it might be a politically convenient narrative and my compassion for humanity doesn’t always translate into action. Ouch. Now, while you’re feeling introspective, read some other posts and articles that might further challenge your point of view. DON’T WRITE, just read.
If the question you posted gets a response in a different tone, even a slightly different tone, you have succeeded in un-trolling yourself! CONGRATULATIONS!
Step Five:
You can now simply thank them for their reply, ask another question, write “Tell me more,” go back to Step 2, try following any suggestions they made, and/or point out where you now agree and where you might still differ WITHOUT rancor. Try to leave the door open; resist the urge to get in one last good lick.
I recently did steps one through five a couple of times with someone who challenged my labeling Trump’s detention centers “concentration camps.” The tone changed a bit (success!) and this was their final post: “This is just an unbelievable parallel you are drawing. Good luck!”
I took him at face value and found a way to agree:
“Thank you for wishing me luck, and I deeply hope that I am wrong.”